I just felt like writing 🩵
It’s been a minute since I’ve solo travelled in new places. I go alone all the time to places i’m familiar with, but there is something so special about navigating a new place by yourself. It brings a special type of presence, the amount of attention I have to pay to my surroundings. I had forgotten how much I love it. I’m sitting down having lunch right in front of La Sagrada Familia in Barcelona, and something in me told me to write. I had been having such an amazing day, starting with a cold plunge in the sea and a piece of cake. Then I made my way around the public transport and did some shopping. I was right by my airbnb but decided to stop for some tapas. I was walking by and a table of four young people started laughing and took turns looking at me. It was very obvious they were laughing at me about something, I’m just not quite sure what. I made a face like wtf and kept walking. I went to the bathroom and checked myself to be sure I didn’t like have toilet paper on my shoe or something like that. Nope, nothing. Probably just laughing at a confident fat woman walking down the street in biker shorts and a sweater. Who knows. For about 3 minutes it got to me. I’m only human and it felt like high school bully vibes, or like my online haters in real life. I thought about their perspective and how sad and boring their lives must be if a random stranger walking down the street is their target. I alchemized it pretty quickly, 3 minutes was about right. I took a deep breath and came back out and got myself a table. The table happens to be within in their site, and for a moment I thought about moving but no. I refuse to hide just because my presence causes a response in some. I refuse.
Anyway idk I just felt like writing about that. I had a friend tell me recently that when things go wrong I’m good at alchemizing it. Not letting it get me down for long. Taking a moment to analyze how I feel, analyze what’s real, and then continue with the truth of the situation. I feel like the truth here is that me doing something as simple as walking down the street will be bothersome to certain humans in the world.
I’m gonna keep on walking though. I hope you do too. Love you, mean it 🩵 Kyla
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